"SOMETHING TO BE RETURNED"

"SOMETHING TO RETURN"

Keep this in mind when you have something to return and the store gives you a hard time
A woman went to a K-Mart service counter and told the clerk she wanted a refund for the toaster she bought because it won't work.

The clerk told her that he can't give her a refund because she bought it on special. Suddenly, the woman threw her arms up in the air and started screaming, "PINCH MY NIPPLES,PINCH MY NIPPLES,PINCH MY NIPPLES!!!!!!"The befuddled clerk ran away to get the store manager in front of a growing crowd of customers.

The manager comes to the woman and asks,"Ma'am what's wrong?" She explained the problem with the toaster, and he also told her that he can't give her a refund because she bought it on special.

Once again, the woman throws her arms up in the air and screamed,"PINCH MY NIPPLES,PINCH MY NIPPLES,PINCH MY NIPPLES!!!"and doing so draws an even bigger crowd! In shock, the store manager pleads, "Ma'am, why are you saying that?" In a huff, the woman says, "BECAUSE, I LIKE TO HAVE MY NIPPLES PINCHED WHEN I'M BEING SCREWED!!"

The crowd broke into applause and her money was quickly refunded!

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"SWEET REVENGE"

To my darling husband,Before you return from your overseas trip I just want to let you know about the small accident I had with the ute when I turned into the driveway.

Fortunately, not too bad and I really didn't get hurt, so please don'tworry too much about me.

I was coming home from K-Mart, and when I turned into the driveway I accidentally pushed down on the accelerator instead of the brake.

The garage door is slightly bent but the ute fortunately came to a halt when it bumped into your car.I am really sorry, but I know with your kind-hearted personality you will forgive me.

You know how much I love you and care for you my sweetheart.

I am enclosing a picture for you. I cannot wait to hold you in my arms again.

Your loving wife, XXX

P.S. Your girlfriend called

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