Gwen's Den

Friday, October 20, 2006

"SENIORS"

What are seniors worth?...Remember,old folks are worth a fortune-
with silver in their hair, gold in their teeth,stones in their kidney,
lead in their feet and gas in their stomaches.

I have become a little older since I saw you last and a few changes
have come into mylife. Frankly,I have become a frivolous old girl,
i'm seeing five gentleman every day.

As soon as I wake up Will Power helps me out of bed.ThenI go to
see John, Next it's time for Uncle Toby to come along, followed
by Billy T.

They leave and Arthur Ritis shows up and stays the rest of the day,
He doesn't like to stay in one place very long so he takes me from joint to joint.
After such a busy day i'm really tired and glad to go to bed with Johnny Walker,
What a life! Oh yes, I'm also flirting with Al Zymer.
##############################################
P.S...The preacher came to call the other day, he said at my age I should
be thinking about the hereafter.
I told him, Oh I do, all the time!No matter where I am, if I'm in the parlour,
upstairs, in the kitchen or down in the basement, I ask myself: Now what am I here after?.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^


"SENIORS ARE LEADING CARRIERS OF AIDS"....
Hearing Aids, Band Aids ,Roll Aids, Walking Aids,
Medical Aids, Goverment Aids,
***************************
Most of all:
Monetary Aids To Their Kids!!

The golden years have come at last
I cannot see, I cannot pee.
I cannot chew, I cannot skrew.
My memory shrinks, my hearing stinks.
No sense of smell, I look like hell.
My body is drooping, got trouble pooping.
The golden years have come at last,
The golden years can kiss my ASS!!!
##################################################

15 Comments:

  • very clever jokes Gwen.. loved them all

    :))

    By Blogger Gazza, at October 20, 2006 7:27 pm  

  • Thanks for the visit Gazz, glad you enjoyed them.
    P.S.See what you have to look forward to..."WOW"

    By Blogger Gwen, at October 20, 2006 7:57 pm  

  • Gday Mate sometimes I feel like those seniors sometimes but i go to bed with St Remy or Napoleon.
    And had a few senior moments lol

    By Blogger Jeanette, at October 20, 2006 9:49 pm  

  • Thanks Jan for your visit,i'm not sure what you mean,Who were those senior moments with?

    By Blogger Gwen, at October 20, 2006 10:11 pm  

  • Hi Gwen, Loved the age jokes, how clever, seniors are the greatest carriers was very funny. Thanks for your visit and kind comments on my site very much appreciated. Cheers Margaret

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at October 20, 2006 11:03 pm  

  • Happy Friday to you, Gwen. Thanks for visiting my blog and for your nice comments. Loved the senior jokes. I feel as if I've been having a lot of them lately -- senior moments, that is. I especially liked the last one about the golden years.

    Thanks for linking me. I will bookmark you also. Have a great day.

    By Blogger Motherkitty, at October 21, 2006 12:48 am  

  • Hey Gwen,

    I'm scared... im like 25yrs behind you, and am experiencing most of that now .. my god.. think I'm in trouble !!! Lucky I got Johnny Walker, Jack Daniels & Jim Beam to see me through it all !!!

    Luv
    Cazz
    xxxoooxx

    By Blogger Cazz, at October 21, 2006 3:36 am  

  • Love those senior jokes!

    The upside of being a senior is all the discounts you get. Although here in California where I'm visiting family, the seniors ages range from 55 to 65, so you always have to ask. And I always ask!

    By Blogger Val, at October 21, 2006 8:01 am  

  • Hi Cazz...It's that Johnny.W.
    Jack.D.and Jim.B,.that gets you in
    trouble...HA!HA!

    By Blogger Gwen, at October 21, 2006 12:32 pm  

  • Hi Val...Thanks for your visit,
    our seniors also range from 55
    onwards.

    By Blogger Gwen, at October 21, 2006 12:35 pm  

  • Hi Mother!!..Glad you enjoyed jokes,thanks for your visit.
    Hope you dont mind me abbreviating your blog name?

    By Blogger Gwen, at October 21, 2006 12:43 pm  

  • Hi Gwen, love the seniors jokes ... although some of those things I am going through at 41 ... scary. I have a little quote on ageing on my blog today, too ... not a funny, though !!
    Have a wonderful weekend.
    Take care, Meow

    By Blogger Meow, at October 21, 2006 5:40 pm  

  • Thanks for your visit,glad you
    enjoyed jokes..

    By Blogger Gwen, at October 21, 2006 7:10 pm  

  • oh man you nearly had me wetting myself at the five men you see daily that was reallyclever and i loved it all lol, giggles are the best way to start the day
    xx
    shona

    By Blogger slap me happy, at October 23, 2006 11:40 am  

  • Hi Gwen ~ These are good jokes. Thanks
    for your comments while my cousin was here, I go behind. I am glad you had a nice trip. Take care, Cheers, Merle.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at October 23, 2006 11:50 pm  

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